Movies to consider...
"(One) Way Out" - Picture this... I'm a double secret agent for the Russkies and resemble a better looking Kevin Costner (with muscles). I pull my face off today and run off to Western Alaska with the nuclear codes. We (us/Russia) set off the bombs we've been stockpiling since the 30s, ending Earth as we know it. Bring on the cockroaches!
"Rocky" - Yeah, man. Rocky. Hell yeah
"Portlandia East" - Not funny, man. Not fucking funny
"Saturday Night Head" - Date Night 2
"Fame" - Fuck you and your autograph request. I'll throw anyone in a trash can that asks for my autograph
"12" - My girlfriend
"Universal Soldier" - Me and Brit kick the Russian mob's asses back to New Jersey
"Seinfeld" - Jerry, George, Elaine, Kramer, Joe and Brit meet at the cofffee shop every day, all day, for 9 years, talking about Brit's hair, Brit's makeup, Brit's smile, Brit's beautiful body. ...What was I saying? Brit's All American girl quality. Joe's courage under fire (Borat: NOT). Too Jewish?
"Stripes" - Joe and Brit join the army. Brit gets army to change the unis from olive green to fuchisia. I kick Russkies asses back to Brooklyn. And we have a surprise party at the end for Tina Fey, our bud
"All The Right Moves" - Joe plays football for MASH's MASHers. Get it? But I stink. My helmet is too big for my skinny body, the girl I love only has eyes for the fucking QB, who is on drugs no matter how pretty he is. The other kids make fun of me all day long in school, but after I score the game winning touchdown they give me the Moss "One Clap" salute. I tell them all to fuck off.
"Late Night With Joe" - Fibromyalgia induces incredible, incredible waves of pain throughout my body
"The Joe Sweeney Story" - Joe gets played for a fool but hooks up with the biggest babe in the world. Won't get fooled again because I'm there, man. I'm there
Brit 'n Joe Remixxss Chapter 13" - We in da house with Joe 'n Brit 'n we playin' playas playlists, playa!
"Broe" - You know the ending
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